Elder financial exploitation: protecting the people who trust us most
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Key takeaways
Elder financial exploitation is the illegal or improper use of an older person’s money or assets, often by someone they trust.
It can involve a stranger running a scam, or a family member, caregiver, or friend misusing access to funds.
Warning signs include sudden account changes, unusual withdrawals, and new “friends” who become involved in financial decisions.
Reporting suspected exploitation to Adult Protective Services or local law enforcement is appropriate even without full certainty.
Remitly’s straightforward, transparent transfer process is designed to be usable safely and confidently at any age.
Elder financial exploitation robs older adults of money and assets, often by someone they trust. Here’s how to recognize it and help protect the people you care about.
What is elder financial exploitation?
Elder financial exploitation is the illegal or improper use of an older person’s money, property, or assets, often carried out by someone in a position of trust, including a family member, caregiver, or new acquaintance, though it can also come from a complete stranger running a scam. It’s considered a form of elder abuse and is a genuinely underreported problem, partly because victims may feel embarrassed, dependent on the person exploiting them, or afraid of straining a family relationship.
Warning signs worth watching for
A sudden change in an older relative’s banking habits, new account activity, unusual withdrawals, or unfamiliar transfers, is worth a gentle, direct conversation rather than being dismissed. The appearance of a new “friend,” caregiver, or romantic interest who quickly becomes involved in an older person’s financial decisions, especially one who discourages contact with family, deserves attention. Missing belongings, unpaid bills despite adequate income, or a reluctance to discuss finances that wasn’t previously typical for that person can all be signals worth exploring further, calmly and without accusation.
Why this form of exploitation is especially hard to recognize
According to the CFPB(opens in new window), financial abuse happens when someone takes or misuses another person’s money or property, and it can come from neighbors, caregivers, professionals, or even family and friends. Victims may be reluctant to say anything out of embarrassment, fear of reprisal, or dependency on the person exploiting them, which is exactly why family members and friends are often in the best position to notice something is wrong, even when the older adult themselves doesn’t raise it.
How Remitly protects you
Remitly’s transfer process is designed to be transparent and straightforward at any age, with clear information about where money is going and confirmation at every step, rather than confusing steps that could be exploited by someone trying to redirect a transfer without the sender’s full understanding. For anyone helping an older family member send or receive money through Remitly, reviewing each transfer together before it’s confirmed is a simple, effective way to add an extra layer of protection.
Red flags to watch for
A new acquaintance who quickly asks to be added to bank accounts or given power of attorney. Legitimate relationships rarely require this level of financial access this quickly.
Sudden, large, or repeated transfers to an unfamiliar recipient. This is worth a direct, caring conversation before the pattern continues.
Isolation from family or friends, especially by someone newly involved in the older person’s life. Exploiters often actively discourage outside contact that might expose what’s happening.
Reluctance or visible anxiety when discussing finances with people who weren’t previously involved in that reaction. This can signal fear or shame tied to exploitation already underway.
Balancing protection with respect for independence
One of the harder aspects of helping protect an older relative is doing so in a way that respects their independence and autonomy rather than making them feel controlled or infantilized. Framing a conversation around shared financial wellness, rather than suspicion of a specific person, and involving the older adult directly in any protective decision rather than making it unilaterally on their behalf, tends to preserve both the relationship and their dignity while still building meaningful protection against exploitation.
Documenting concerns without confronting prematurely
Noticing early warning signs without yet being certain exploitation is occurring is a common, uncomfortable position. Quietly documenting specific observations, dates, amounts, and unusual behavior, provides something concrete to work with if a report to Adult Protective Services or a discussion with other family members eventually becomes necessary. Avoiding a premature, unsupported accusation protects the relationship while enough clarity is gathered to know whether and how to act. For general guidance on recovering after any fraud has already occurred, Remitly’s scam recovery guide(opens in new window) covers the practical steps to take.
The role of banks and credit unions in catching exploitation early
Many financial institutions now train staff specifically to recognize signs of elder financial exploitation, such as an unusual withdrawal pattern or a customer who seems pressured by someone accompanying them. Letting an older relative’s bank know about specific concerns, where privacy rules allow, can add another set of trained eyes watching for warning signs alongside a family’s own.
Why timing a conversation matters
Choosing a calm, private moment for a conversation about finances, rather than raising concerns during a family gathering or a moment of stress, generally leads to a more productive discussion. An older relative is more likely to engage openly when they don’t feel put on the spot in front of others.
Common questions about elder financial exploitation
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What should I do if I suspect an older relative is being financially exploited?
Have a calm, non-judgmental conversation with them first if possible, and separately, report the concerns to the local Adult Protective Services agency, which handles exactly this kind of situation. If there’s an urgent, ongoing risk, contacting local law enforcement is also appropriate.
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Is it exploitation if a family member is genuinely helping manage finances with permission?
Not necessarily. The distinction is whether the older adult has knowingly and willingly authorized the arrangement and retains as much control as they’re able to, versus a situation where money or assets are being taken or misused without genuine informed consent.
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How can I help protect an older relative without being overly controlling?
Focus on open communication, offering to review statements together periodically, and encouraging a trusted contact designation with their bank, rather than taking over their finances outright, which preserves their independence while still creating a layer of protection.
In Summary
Elder financial exploitation is difficult to recognize precisely because it often comes from someone trusted, but knowing the warning signs and having open, caring conversations with older family members creates real protection.
This publication is provided for general information purposes only and is not intended to cover all aspects of the topics discussed herein. This publication is not a substitute for seeking advice from an applicable specialist or professional. The content in this publication does not constitute legal, tax, or other professional advice from Remitly or any of its affiliates and should not be relied upon as such. While we strive to keep our posts up to date and accurate, we cannot represent, warrant, or otherwise guarantee that the content is accurate, complete, or up to date.