You float off the massage table feeling calm and genuinely relaxed. Your shoulders finally dropped, and your jaw unclenched sometime around minute twenty. For a beautiful moment, everything feels right. And then you walk to the front desk, only to pause and see the total on the screen. Suddenly, instead of calm, you’re thinking, “Wait, how much am I supposed to tip?”
If you’re new to the US, this moment can feel very awkward and uncomfortable. Tipping culture works differently here, and massage tipping etiquette isn’t always clear. At Remitly, a lot of us have experienced just how overwhelming these small cultural moments can be when you’re settling into life in a new country. So, we’ve put together this guide to make sure you walk out of your next massage holding onto that calm and relaxed feeling you paid for.
Why massage tipping feels confusing in the US
Tipping after a massage feels awkward precisely because it’s not standard practice for many people, unlike when you’re sitting at a restaurant table with a check in front of you. You’ve just spent an hour trying to relax, and suddenly you’re supposed to make a quick decision about money without causing offense.
If you didn’t grow up with US tipping culture, this moment can feel uncomfortable. In a lot of places around the world, tips are either built into the price or it’s not really a thing at all. So it can feel strange, even if no one is actually watching you.
For most, the confusion isn’t about generosity; it’s more about not knowing the norms. That’s where the ‘golden rule” comes in.
The “golden rule”: standard tip for a massage
US citizens and long-time residents have perfected the art of tipping down to a fine science. But as a newcomer, you haven’t yet developed the innate sense of the appropriate gratuity to offer in different scenarios.
However, guidelines like the golden rule take all the guesswork out of this process. Simply, this “rule” refers to the standard amount you should tip anyone who provides you a service, whether it’s your restaurant server, valet, pet groomer, or, in this case, massage therapist.
According to the golden rule, you should offer a gratuity of at least 20% any time you go in for a massage appointment. That’s the number most people use, and it’s rarely questioned. So, for a $100 USD massage, leaving a $20 USD tip is standard.
But there’s some flexibility around this figure, and tips ranging from 15–20% are generally acceptable.
- 15% if you’re satisfied with the service.
- 20% if you enjoyed a stand-out service or received some extras.
- Over 20% if your massage therapist truly went above and beyond, whether in terms of time, effort, or perks.
Why tips matter
In the US, many service providers rely on tips to supplement their income.
Take massage therapists, for example. They earn an average $27.43 USD per hour, according to the US Bureau of Labor Statistics. This means that they earn less than the price of a 50-minute session, which could cost you anywhere from $180 USD or more.
So, tipping isn’t just the nice thing to do, but it’s a great way to honor the professional providing you with this service. Just think of it as part of the real cost of the massage, rather than something extra you’re being surprised with at the end.
When it makes sense to tip more or less
Not every massage feels the same, so it makes sense that tipping isn’t always one-size-fits-all. Different situations can come up, and it helps to know how people usually handle them.
Deep tissue, sports, or physically demanding massages
If you booked a deep tissue or sports massage, your therapist probably worked pretty hard, and for longer. This is the kind of massage where you leave feeling looser, but your therapist leaves feeling it in their arms and shoulders.
Because these sessions take more physical effort, it’s common for people to want to leave a slightly bigger tip. If someone spent an hour tackling knots you didn’t even know you had, tipping on the higher end is a natural way to say thank you for the effort.
Exceptional service
Every now and then, you get a massage that really hits the mark. The type that gives you the most blissful night’s sleep you’ve had in months. Maybe your therapist asked the right questions, adjusted pressure without you having to ask twice, or somehow found the exact spot that’s been bothering you for weeks. When a session feels that thoughtful, tipping a little more often feels like the obvious choice.
What if the experience wasn’t great?
Sometimes, it just doesn’t click. The pressure’s off, the timing feels rushed, or you leave thinking, “Well, that was fine, I guess.”
In those cases, tipping on the lower end is reasonable. And if something was genuinely wrong, mentioning it to the front desk or manager usually does more good than quietly leaving no tip at all. Most places want to know so they can make the next visit better, for you or the next person they see.
Does the setting matter?
The short answer is yes. Where you get your massage can change what’s expected, and this is one of those areas where people tend to overthink things.
Resorts and high-end spas
At resorts and nicer spas, it’s pretty common for a service charge or automatic gratuity to be added to your bill. Sometimes it’s obvious, but it’s often tucked away in the fine print, so always take a quick look at the receipt at the end of your service.
If gratuity is already included, you’re covered. You don’t need to add more unless you genuinely want to. Some people do if the service feels amazing, but it’s very much optional, not expected.
Private practice or self-employed therapists
You might have heard that you’re not supposed to tip the owner of a business. In the massage world today, that rule doesn’t really hold up.
Most independent or self-employed massage therapists still expect and appreciate tips, just like anyone else. Unless they tell you not to, sticking with the standard 20% guideline is completely normal and won’t feel out of place.
Medical or clinical settings
Things change once a massage is clearly part of medical care. If you’re in a doctor’s office, chiropractor’s clinic, or physical therapy setting, tipping is usually not expected and sometimes isn’t allowed. When a session feels more clinical than relaxing, the easiest thing to do is ask the front desk what’s appropriate.
Common awkward massage tipping moments
Even if you know the general tipping expectations, massage appointments come with their own brand of awkwardness.
The tip screen pops up while they’re standing there
From your side of the screen, this moment can feel exposed or rushed. From theirs, it’s just another checkout. Massage therapists see these screens all day and aren’t tracking what anyone chooses.
One small thing that helps is deciding roughly what you’ll tip before the session ends. That way, when the time comes, you’re just finishing a transaction, not making a decision under pressure.
You’re not sure whether gratuity is included
It’s not always clear whether a tip has already been added to the bill, especially at spas or hotels. But don’t worry, asking a polite “Does this include gratuity?” clears things up easily. Front desk staff get this question all the time. It doesn’t come across as awkward or stingy; it just helps you avoid confusion.
After leaving, you realize that you forgot to tip
This happens more often than people like to admit. Sometimes you’re relaxed, a little spaced out, or already thinking about your next stop. If you notice right away, you can usually go back to the desk or ask if there’s a way to add a tip digitally. Staff are used to it, and no one is quietly judging a single missed moment.
Making tipping feel straightforward
Most questions about tipping don’t come from uncertainty about percentages, but from overthinking the moment. Once you see what’s actually worked in real life, a lot of the pressure tends to disappear.
What’s the best way to tip?
The way you tip matters much less than the fact that you did. If you have cash, it’s often appreciated because it’s immediate, but no one expects you to carry wads of money around just for tipping. Credit or debit cards are by far the most common option now. Most people tap, sign, and move on without thinking twice.
For independent therapists or mobile service providers, apps like Venmo, Cash App, or Zelle are increasingly normal. If someone mentions it as an option, it usually means they’re used to it and comfortable with that method.
What you shouldn’t overthink when tipping
Tipping can feel strangely emotional, but it doesn’t have to be. You don’t need to explain your choice, compare yourself to other customers, or worry about whether someone is quietly judging your math.
In practice, people tip quickly and move on. Acting thoughtfully and respectfully is enough. Don’t worry, everything else tends to matter far less than it feels in the moment.
How to plan for tipping before you book a massage
A little planning can make the entire experience feel calmer if it’s your first time. When you see the price of a service, mentally adding around 20% upfront helps set expectations and avoid last-minute surprises. Planning ahead means you get to actually enjoy the experience, rather than doing tons of mental math during checkout.
The easy rule to keep in mind
Tipping isn’t meant to turn a relaxing experience into a stressful calculation. It’s just a quiet way to express gratitude for someone’s time and effort. The simplest takeaway is that for a massage you enjoyed in the US, a 20% tip is the standard. That number works in most non-medical settings; you don’t need to adjust it or wonder if you missed a hidden rule.
Getting comfortable with things like tipping is part of settling into a new country, and it doesn’t happen all at once. At Remitly, we know how many endless everyday questions come up when you’re moving to a different country. We’re here to make those moments feel more manageable so you can focus on enjoying your new life.
FAQs
Do I tip on the full price if I used a coupon or gift card?
In most cases, yes. Tips are usually based on the original price of the service, not the discounted total.
Is it rude to ask the receptionist what’s standard?
Not at all. Asking what’s typical shows consideration and helps you feel more confident about your choice.
What if I can’t afford a 20% tip?
If money is tight, tipping around 15 percent is still respectful. Planning ahead or booking a shorter session next time can help.
Do you tip the owner of a massage business?
Yes. In modern settings, tipping the owner or self-employed therapist is standard unless they clearly say otherwise.
Should you tip per therapist in a couples or shared session?
Yes. Tips are usually given separately to each therapist who worked with you.